I have been looking for techniques on how to discipline the kids, especially Ryz. I’ve already said in my post in my other blog about my problem with her and my fear of getting a heart ailment because of suppressing my anger and the stress it has been giving me. I’ve been hearing the time-out strategy and saw this even applied in Super Nanny which I really think is a very helpful TV program and I would recommend for parents to watch. It is not just for those who are having problems with their kids but to all parents in general.
A time-out involves temporarily separating a child from an environment where inappropriate behavior has occurred, and is intended to remove positive reinforcement of the behavior. It is an educational and parenting technique recommended by some pediatricians and developmental psychologists as an effective form of child discipline. Often a corner (hence the common term corner time) or a similar space where the child is to stand or sit during time-outs is designated. – Wikipedia
I was wondering how effective a time-out is and will my kids really be disciplined if I apply this to them. Although it is said that this can be a useful strategy, how we do it and the circumstances could complicate and affect its success.
Rationale. The main purpose behind the time-out is to give your child a time to calm down after a rage or any improper behavior and sort out his thoughts, hoping for him to realize what he has done wrong. This is not meant to scare him but just to take him away from the environment.
Consistent and Timely. In giving a time-out, you should apply it as soon as the behavior erupted. Do not wait after a few hours and use it. Pre-schoolers are the “right here, right now” type so giving them a time-out minutes or hours after will do no good. Stick to your decision and don’t give empty threats or delay the decision. The idea is your child should know that bad behavior NOW is equivalent to a consequence NOW.
Select a quiet place. It is not a good idea to have their bedroom as the place for a time-out. It will not give them a chance to think because of the distractions surrounding them. The best place for a timeout is a chair situated in a quiet corner and is away from anything which could divert their attention to. It is important also that you have a visual of them while in a time-out.
Time frame. Pre-schoolers can not stay put for a long time so as soon as you see your child has calmed down you can let them leave the spot. If you see your child get up how many times from the time-out spot, give him two warnings and remind him that he can only get out if you say so. If he keeps on doing it, sit him on your lap, gently but firmly hold him until he’s calm. Deep breathing also helps. Show him how to deeply breath in from the nose and out from the mouth until he’s relaxed. Instead of yelling at him, stay quiet. Most importantly, do not use physical force just to get him to stay put in a time-out.
It’s never fun taking a time-out. Don’t think your child will be happy while taking a time-out. Some kids keep on yelling and shouting while in a time-out. Being so young and having these emotions that they can’t handle upset them. It’s better to be quiet and not fight with him while he’s in this situation. Let him calm down on his own. It’s okay if this doesn’t happen. The important thing is you should see an improvement in his behavior after a time-out.
Do not use the technique too much. If you feel like your child is spending almost the whole day in a time-out, it’s time you asses his behavior. Maybe he is just interested in his surroundings and being inquisitive. The best time to use the technique is when you see if his emotions are about to take over his senses.
Disciplining our kids can be very strenuous. It requires never ending patience on our part. As parents, we are responsible in honing our kids so they grow to be a respectful and responsible person.
I was so sad yesterday. When hubby picked me up from my German class he told me that Kindergarten called and said that Ryz was hurt while going to the woods. It was their outdoor day and usually they go to the forest and do some explorations. So I said, ok. But I never thought that I would be that surprised when we went to fetch them…
I almost cried when I saw this wound and bump on her forehead. I never expected that it was this bad. Her teacher said that she ran while they were going to the woods and stumbled. And who wouldn’t while wearing rubber boots?! Ryz just loves to run…
After we picked the kids up, we just ate lunch and went straight to her Pediatrician. Good thing it was not that serious. He just gave her a pain reliever and told us to observe if she’ll vomit or would complain of pains. Nevertheless it was all okay.
The usual Ryz, it seemed nothing happened. She’s still that same, old active little girl after this accident.
On a lighter note she just came up with a name for her pink piggy bank while waiting for her doctor and I couldn’t get over it. I was suggesting her several names and she came up with just Piggy… Piggy Ramos. So there’s a new member in our family.
The very helpful Ryz… It’s normal for her to say “Can I help you, Daddy?” every time she sees his Dad tinkering on something or to me while I’m folding the dried laundry. I can even ask her to assist me in preparing the table before meal. I’m really glad of this nature of her. I hope she can still be helpful to other people when she grows up but not to the extent of meddling in other people’s lives. Hehe..
The latest where she offered her help was when I was in the kitchen. She wanted to help me cook our meal but I couldn’t let her assist me that time ‘coz I was frying. Then I just let her wash some plastic ware. (Pardon for the mess, I just had to take a picture of her doing this.)
I wonder if she’s just getting bored with her toys and opt to do some chores…
One thing for sure though, I know I’ll have a daughter who’ll always be willing to give a helping hand…
Last February 21 was the Faschingdienstag or the Carnival here in the southern part of Germany. Although celebrations start as early as January, carnival week officially starts on the Thursday before the Ash Wednesday. During this festivity parties are held and attendees come in different costumes. Zyc and Ryz also went to the Kindergarten in their costumes.
Ryz went in her Cinderella dress and Zyc in a Polizist costume. When I had the chance to go back to the Philippines last year, I brought this dress that Ryz used when she was in preschool here with me. I know she would love wearing this in their Fasching.
For the Faschingdienstag, we bought another princess costume (of course!) for Ryz. She just loves to become a princess!
Did I mention that people also love face painting during Fasching? So Ryz came home in this…
Zyc went in a pirate costume.
He never came home with a paint on his face, knowing him as an OC and doesn’t want to get dirty.
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